babbling.

so, the other night was nice.  i mean, it wasn't like wonderfully amazing.  but it wasn't bad either.
i don't really know what i expected to happen.
just anything, i guess.
but it wasn't any different from the norm.

we still haven't talked about what's up with us.
which i'm fine with, in theory.

i don't actually want to talk about it.
and i don't really have any urge to initiate the talk.

but damnit, why hasn't he?

i make no sense.  i don't want to talk about our relationship but i want him to want to talk about it.
it's pretty ridiculous.

but it makes sense.  to me at least.  and probably to anyone else with a uterus.

it's got to happen eventually, right?
at the very least we'll have to decide if we want to see other people at all.

it's weird.  sometimes i wonder if he's gone on dates recently.  but i don't get jealous or anything.  because i really don't think he has.
but if he did, i'd be really upset.
which may or may not be okay.

i hate that the obvious answer is to just ask him.
because that's the last thing i want to or think i should do.